Good But Not Great

I guess it says something of my ability when I can turn in a 2.03.72 800m and be disappointed.
Having sat here five times in the last ten weeks after good races and been upbeat about my times and performances it,s hard to sit here and feel something I don,t for this evenings race,yes it was exceptionaly hot still at 6.15-6.20pm when my race went off but I won,t cite that as an excuse,yes it,s possible I left a little too much on the track at Franklin Field this week but I don,t think I,d go back and do anything differently in training this week even if I could.
Seeded 12th in the fastest heat{seed times 1.55-2.03 and I seeded myself at 2.03}I was on the outside of the starting line,for once I had a good reaction to the starting gun something over the 800m I,m not always able to say and going into the first turn I found myself out in lane 3.......somewhere I,d end up staying for almost the entire first lap,briefly going down the back straight I considered putting on a spurt to hit the front if only to get me on the inside lane,I didn,t and found myself continuing to be forced out wide.
29 seconds at 200m and 59 seconds at the bell,so far so good,finally at the bell I was able to get over into lane 1 and went through in 3rd or 4th,maybe even 5th,having finally gotten into the inside lane I now found myself being passed on the outside,at 44 I was giving the field a major age differential,I,d say most of the other 11 runners in this heat were college runners and I should be pleased w/ the fact I tried to live w/ them.
I just didn,t have it off that final turn,I,d been forced to run an uneconomic race on that first lap and I couldn,t find that gear change coming up the home straight.10th out of 12 runners in 2.03.72 not the worst time in the world,it ranks as my 8th fastest ever 800m but I was hoping for better period,not to mention looking for a fast seed time for Spokane,the on again,off again 4x400m relay at the MAC C,ships looks like being back on again meaning I,m now looking at the July 8th Plymouth Whitemarsh meet as my final 800m race to get a faster seed time than the 2.03.07 I ran at Deleware.
I,m sure come tomorrow I,ll find some more positives from this evenings race but for now it isn,t sitting well w/ me,sure next week there,s another race but it,s possible that it,s another four weeks b4 I race another 800m and that,s a long time to mull over what didn,t go quite to plan this evening.